Social Anxiety Forums

Goodman · Anonymous

I don't know how to cope with my social anxiety. I have no problems going out in public, but I avoid talking to people at all costs. I have a major problem with authority due to my bad upbringing, and I tend to be a "people pleaser." I try to do whatever I can to get the respect and approval of others. My girlfriend and I haven't been in an argument (we've been together for 8 months), and I think it's because I never speak up. I sit here in my cubicle at work all day, and I'm afraid to interact with my co-workers. I don't want to seem like a snob or a grouch, but I'm sure that's how I'm perceived. I am in college, and I still haven't made any friends. I sometimes don't know what to talk about with my girlfriend because I'm to focused on myself and how I'm going to mess something up. Again, I don't want to be like this, but I can't help it. I don't really have any friends or hobbies. I wish life was different and I could be outgoing and fun. Advice?

Annie1 · Anonymous

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy ("Talk Therapy") can give you strategies to cope with your social anxiety. There are several websites for it as well, one is listed below...

It may sound like an oxymoronish thing to say, but talking with others who have SA can help you not only get over having it, but also help give you practice in relating to others without fear.

Bobo3 · Anonymous

I had the same problem a few years back and my doctor prescribed PAXIL and it helped a lot, you can try ZOLOFT or a couple other medications but they all have to be prescribed by your doctor. And as far as I know, it's all caused by an imbalance of chemicals in the brain and so it can't be treated by therapy alone, but you have to check with your doctor.Get more info at webmd.com, good luck

Guide · Anonymous

You've made a good first step. I know this isn't what you want to hear, but I suggest therapy. Social anxiety, from what I've heard, is one of more easily treated disorders (by therapy). That's good news for a lot of people! There's nothing wrong with seeking help, these people are professionally trained to do just that. My sister (who has a pHd in psychology) had my daughter last summer and gave her some books, I wish I knew what they were but I don't. Assertiveness workshops might help but you need more than that, you need a boost in self-confidence and some techniques for approaching people. I about passed out when I was in California with my daughter to meet a group of people (she went off to China for a year!) and she just walked up to this kid and asked him if he was part of the group and where he was from ... wow, she would never have done that before. She said she just heard that you think of what someone would say to you in that situation and DO it. Really scarey at first but it catches on.

Me, I finally started taking jobs that required me to answer phones and deal with the public. I can barely remember my social anxiety days but they lasted well into my 40s! And I'm only approaching 50 now.